About Me

Ok. Well according to Raymond, I’m the most unimportant person in this universe. So according to that theory, no one would bother looking at this page…

But as we all know, that is not so, as he would rather talk to me about me being unimportant than to go to Oakland to talk with the beggers there. So ha… Raymond, your theory sucks…

Anyways, this is about me, not Raymond. So I don’t know why I even bothered to put him on a post about me.  So here goes… (PLZ DONT STALK ME… I know that many of you are stalkers… yes I’m talking to YOU)

Name: David Cheng (Who is taking notes on this… you have better knew my name before even deciding to visit my blog)

Birthstone: Traditional-> Zircon

Year of Birth: 1994

Day of the week: First Tuesday…

Place where I first took in Oxygen and released Carbon Dioxide: Iowa

Gender: Male

Political Views: Natural Selection (Yes, I do mean the best and most fit person gets to eat up the rest of us. Actually I’m not being pessimistic, reality works that way)

Religion: Davidism… or Dragonism… no difference

By now you should have left the page as I’m a BORING person with no life… But for my dear followers… I shall continue.

Relationship status: No partner, no relationships, I was and still is completely single…. and no I’m not gay, because that would mean that I have a male partner… Rohan your logic sucks, no offense… But I digress… so yeah, completely single (Not hard to imagine… a guy with a boring life will not tend to have a high charismatic levels).

Hobbies: Magic the Gathering, Badminton, Chess with William, Running, Story writing, and etc. etc.

Views and theories: My philosophical views are abundant… I might write a manuel later… Well here goes->

Osmosis Theory: According to science, water from an area of high concentration will move towards an area of low concentration. In the osmosis theory of human behavior, everything moves from a high concentration to a lower concentration. Anything includes ideas, thought, objects, and other stuff like that. Due to this theory perverted ideas, smartness, addiction habits, and other stuff can go over too. This will explain why your friends are always similar to you. This may or may not be further explained (Depends on my mood).

God’s Theory:  I’m sorry if offend you people and gods… Don’t get converted by me because of this… Its not right to convert people… Anyways the theory: God is sadistic… He makes people and makes half of them not believe him so that he can punish them later on. God is supposed to be powerful, so why doesn’t he implant good things into our head and make us all good and nice. I’m guessing that he really loves tormenting us because he is on top of the food chain (or all powerful for that matter). So yeah, Dragonism rules: The top of the food chain rules over the rest. As the maker is on the top, he gets to torment us until someone tops him. Disclaimer: From a certain somebody, they wanted me to put that the god I put here is a general word used to refer to a being(s) who created this world and not referring to any religion’s god.

Tip theory: Tips are to be given to the waiters that really deserve them… not to any random waiter who gives you a cup of tea and then never comes until he makes you pay the bill. (Note that I am NOT trying to fire a whole bunch of waiters, this is just my theory) So this is how I rate: 20% start off (Yes that is higher than other people…). Drop that immediately to 15% if he isn’t perfect. So a perfect scenario: $100 order-> 20% tip because the guy was good. So you pay 120 and leave… BUT they are never perfect (find me a perfect one, note if they make any mistake they are not perfect and they start at 15%.) and so thats where the deductions start. Since he isn’t perfect, drop it down to fifteen, so we can start. When you have finished deciding what you want to order start a timer. Every five minutes that they do not come, take off, 1% of their tip amount (15*0.01=0.15-> they get 14.85 if they make you wait for five minutes) *Note here that the 15$ tip was made on the $100 order and so yours might have to change, cell phone calculators are useful. Now the order, if the waiter doesn’t have a happy face as he approaches and asks, drop five percent from his new tip (14.85*0.95= 14.12 cents left). I understand that orders take long and there shall never be any deductions based on that. But… if they were giving, let’s say, a drink, with your order and they didn’t give it to you within five minutes of the meal being served, drop another five percent to their new tip. ($13.32). Each time you go to ask for the thing they forgot, subtract 10%. ($11.99),. If the waiter didn’t give you a meal (he like completely forgot and you have to remind him that you did indeed order something) drop a whopping 20 % form the order, as you should really punish the waiter for being so careless. (9.60). Other big mistakes such as making you pass the right meal to each person, spilling something on you or your family, or anything you deem big, drop ten percent from your new tip and minor mistakes will drop them 1-5%. MAJOR MISTAKES, such as dripping something on your date, scaring off your date, or anything equally as bad, will cause you to do a MAJOR DEDUCTION of 30%. Anyways this system works on a round up system, so even if it’s like $9.0000000001  round it to $9.01. ALWAYS ROUND UP. So that shows that the lowest tip that a waiter could get is a penny, not nothing, which leads to my penny theory…

Penny Theory: A single penny is worse than nothing at all. If your waiter really sucked at his job, and he really doesn’t deserve a tip, drop off a penny anyways. If you drop nothing, the waiter will believe that you are just some ass who doesn’t like to give tips, but a penny or two left in the middle of the table  with the other stuff cleared so that it is seen easily and has its head(s) up so that the waiter can see Abraham, really shows what you think about the waiter. The penny isn’t even worth the effort to bend down and pick up so you are actually giving him negative money as his business would have gone better if he didn’t have to waste two seconds collecting a penny. Two seconds add up quickly and if everyone thinks that the waiter only deserves a penny, he’d be wasting so much time that the manager will decide to fire him.

Name Theory: Yes this is the most stupidest theory ever, but oh well. These are human philosophy and therefore it shall be on here as well. So in the theory that no one really accepts, names are important. Sometimes even more important than the content. Names give power behind the named object. It may tell the other person what you are trying to show or it may be giving a red herring, concealing the real thing that is behind the concealment.  For example: If you named Mouse Hunt, The Entrapment Game, the reader will persume that the game is more mysterious than Mouse Hunt. On the other hand, if you name your Blastoise, Bulbasaur, and your opponent decided that he is gonna be a smart person and throw down a Charizard, then you just utterly screwed him, and so that would suck for him. Names gives spirit to the object. Calling something by its normal name doesn’t give much spirit to it, while calling it by a strong name gives a completely different feeling (Yes this is why games name things weirdly…). So yes, names are as important, if not more important, than the content (they give good impressions too).

Types of People Theory: There are three types of people in this world. I shall begin to list them:

1. Optimistic: This is the best one to be probably unless you are about to get killed, which then you probably die happy too… I really don’t know. Anyways like I said. This type is the one who will think everything in a good way. This causes them to be very happy thought their entire life. People strive to go here if possible but its not possible for all. Ex. Yes! I got an 1/10 on my Science Quiz. At least it wasn’t a zero and hey its only 10% of my grade. Let’s party guys!
2. Pessimistic: The second most common of all. This type thinks negatively about everything. These people tend to live a depressing life but at least they are not shunned from the public. These people also are usually smart. The very emotional and people who suicide are usually pessimists. Ex. DAMN IT. Only a 104% as my class average for A.P. Calculus. <slaps self> Arg! I missed one percent because I didn’t do one classwork. And shut up, I don’t care if I am first place in our school. I can’t believe I’m so stupid to have missed one percent.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        -sigh- very depressing
3. Now the most uncommon of the types… Realistic. These types of people are realistic, like seriously realistic with no ups or downs. So they will live in a boring society thinking realistic thoughts, doing realistic tasks, and just all the boring stuff. Most of these qualities can be found in stockholders, high-level businessmen, and other people who need to take care of statistics and everything. Ex. Lets see… the worst scenario is if she says no, which then I still have no partner for the promotional. But wait, if she says yes, then I’ll get something out of it. It’s a win-win situation, what could go wrong…? Oh wait…. If I get rejected, then my friends will like laugh at me and I’ll be more depressed.  I’m going to check my charismatic levels: Yesterday: sat by computer chatting and doing nothing, playing calculator games, reading MouseHunt Forums, playing MouseHunt=Not too high… Oh dang… that means i have more than 50% of getting rejected… Not good. Maybe I should just not ask. But then my few friends will say I’m too chicken… Damn it, what do i do………. Actually that’s probably too deep… I’ll find a better example… Ok here goes: Lets see… The chances to survive this ride is 70%… I better avoid it as 30% is pretty high. At a Fair: Shoot a bulls-eye and win a big stuffed animal, one ball for 3$… The chances of winning this is too slim, I’m not gonna do it.

So yeah… you can see who you are…

Supernaturalist Theory: Supernatural beings rarely exist and probably one out of a million is one of them. Supernatural means that they are superior in all aspects: Intellect and Brawn/Beauty. But as I have just mentioned, supernaturalists don’t exist (or rarely if they do). Apparel and intellect are inversely proportional to each other. No one, unless they are special, have both of them, tho some people have some combination of the two. So the world is split into five types: Supernatural: the best type in this world (top tier); Smart, but bad looks/are weak; Beautiful/muscular, but not too bright; some brains and beauty/brawn (most people); no brain or  beauty/brawn (the most pitiful people, people should pity them and help them out).

I have like a few other theories but I’m too lay to right them now…

Favorite Quotes:

“Plack!”- Me
“My Facebook Chat is actually working if you can see this message!”- Me
“All but me, Charge!”- Some selfish Goblin, IB
“I’m bored”- Everyone on Facebook
“…My christmas vacation will be better spent at school.”- Jenny Xia
“The dragon is a perfect marriage of power and the will to use it.” -Sarkhan Vol
“Knowledge is power!”- Francis Bacon
“Yosh!”-Monkey D. Luffy
“If you can see this bumper sticker, then I can brake and sue you.”- Neil Desai
“I’ll be Back”- Me and Arnold Schwarzenegger
“If you find yourself and a friend being chased by a king cheetah, you have but one chance: Trip your friend”. -Suq’Ata wisdom
“Don’t try to outrun one of Dominaria’s grizzlies; it’ll catch you, knock you down, and eat you. Of course, you could run up a tree. In that case you’ll get a nice view before it knocks down the tree and eats you.”- How to survive a bear attack
“War is a conflict that determines not who is right—but who is left.” – War Philosophy #1
“When you get near a black ho, you can’t get out!” -Raymond Liu

Old user: Dragonist-> New user: Dragonistear: Reason-> Dragonist was such a popular name and so everyone it was too open and I couldn’t specify myself. Dragonistear was a specialized name developed in a chat with the producer and it is now my name… future accounts and stuff that I’ll do will be under that name…

Yeah… anyone else want to add anything they know about me, just comment and yeah… I’ll reply by either fixing it or something…